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who could love you like me?
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 2nd, 2005|08:50 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
i <3 my life |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 15th, 2004|08:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crushed | ] |
i feel like ive lose my grasp on life , like im out of control , i go to work i come home i smoke some people come over and eat and go to bed... all my life is , is weed, ive lost my frineds i feel like i have nothing , i hate everything im all tied up in this and i cant fucking get out of it and i have no real friends to help me ...i just wanna die... |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 13th, 2004|08:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  satisfied | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
if you had to pick one way to go out what would u pick... id drown |
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| im 20.... |
[Nov. 13th, 2004|05:29 pm] |
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im moving to venice beach june 1st 05... |
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| i stold this from mr underwood |
[Nov. 12th, 2004|04:01 pm] |
Post anonymously, giving me three clues as to who you are. Then let me try to guess.
You can be cryptic or obvious, use long clues or single words. I don't expect to guess most of them, especially for people I haven't met in person, but I can take some stabs in the dark and offend you all horribly by guessing wrong :)
Remember to post anonymously.
<3 |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 8th, 2004|03:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cold | ] |
 its speaks for its self |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 8th, 2004|02:59 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | matt costa | ] |
its cold and i hate it im freaking the fuck out... its fall or whatever the windows should be closed...
i have a job interveiw tomorrow ... i better get it so im not so bored...
 MATT COSTA IS THE HOTTEST MAN IN THE WORLD ... www.mattcosta.com |
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| this could not be more right |
[Nov. 8th, 2004|02:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cold | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
You are an orange thats fallen on the floor.
Something really knocked you down ,didn't it?
Come on man! Don't let your pride get in the
way! You glow! You just haven't found your
calling yet. Until you do something to get
yourself back, people are just going to keep
tripping on you, including you!
The Whats In Your Kitchen Personality Test
brought to you by Quizilla |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 4th, 2004|10:07 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | crushed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | taking back sunday | ] |
hmmm...
i passed now im looking for jobs...
i still love...
him.... |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 10th, 2004|05:21 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | taking back sunday | ] |
my BIG test is thrusday the 14th ... wish me luck.... |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2004|09:10 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
A - Age 20 as o like 6 hours ago
B - Band listening to right now : fall out ...
C - Career in future: hair desser / fly gorl
D - Dad's name: WALTER DEAN
E - Easiest person to talk to: eh..zachy carl
F - Favorite band at the moment: falloutboy
G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: BEARS
H - Hometown: salas
I - Instruments: naw
K - Kids: new borns to 5 cute ,5 to 17 ew ...the movie is good t
L - Longest car ride ever: salas to la to oc to sd to oc to sd to oc to sd salas
M - Mom's name: kellyann
N - Number of siblings: one alisha one brad
P - Phobia[s]- eh
Q - Favorite Quote: "suck my dick bitch im zachy carl"
R - Reason to smile: mrjones and weed
S - Song you sang last: lets get it on
T - Time you wake up: 9ish
U - Unknown fact about me: my boobs are FAKE ... sware
V - Vegetable you hate: Brussel sprouts ew yeah
W - Worst habit: everytime i smoke getting higher than b4
X - X-rays you've had: arm?
Y - Yummy food: animal style frys
Z - Zodiac sign: libra yes
TEN people I enjoy the company of (in no specific order):
1. sean
2. mrjones
3. dick
4. jp
5. zachy
6. kiatty
7. CHRIS UNDERWOOD
8. dahara
9. lisa
10. scott
NINE current favorite songs:
1. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
2. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
3. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
4. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
5. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
6. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
7. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
8. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
9. tell mick he just made my list of things to do today
EIGHT things im wearing:
1. apple bottoms
2. pf shirts
3. hellokitty boy shorts
4. a whitebra
5. nail polish
6. eye liner
7. cover up
8. mascara.
SEVEN things on my mind:
1. weed
2. weed
3. weed
4. weed
5. weed
6. weed
7. sex
SIX items I touch everyday:
1. my twat
2. my phone
3. my hair
4. my shoes
5. eyeliner.
6. my nose
FIVE things I do everyday:
1. smoke.
2. eat.
3. shower.
4. go online.
5. drink something with caffeine in it. amanda im thesame here..
FOUR things I want to do before I die:
1. fuck travis
2. fuck travis
3. fuck travis
4. fuck travis
its the only thing left on my list
.THREE things I think when I wake up:
1. fuck
2. pot?
3. will it be today when HE gets u and goes wow she realy did love me
TWO of my favorite foods:
1. amimal style frys
2. fun oions
ONE person I love more than any other:
1. my self im the only one what will always be here |
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| today... |
[Oct. 9th, 2004|09:07 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  high | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
im 20 yay...im gold |
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| the patron saint of lairs and fakes |
[Oct. 4th, 2004|09:02 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | dead | ] |
| [ | music |
| | falloutboy | ] |
SORRY I CANT TYPE maybe yo will all understand me more if you know what i go thru with mom and daddy...
I Heart MrJones: hey
Iheartzachycarl: whats up
I Heart MrJones: no matter what i say ever never let me have kids
I Heart MrJones: ok?
Iheartzachycarl: ok
Iheartzachycarl: why
I Heart MrJones: cuz my mom and dad fucked me up
Iheartzachycarl: whats wrong
I Heart MrJones: they suck
I Heart MrJones: its like im getting oldder so im be coming friends with them
I Heart MrJones: but i cant handel that cuz they dont understand me
I Heart MrJones: and dont want ot
Iheartzachycarl: well, how else can you act
I Heart MrJones: they just tihnk im soem freak i hate it
I Heart MrJones: its liek the other night i told my mom to watch that movie gummo and she said " im not seeing anythign you liek ur a dumb freak"
Iheartzachycarl: thats so lame
I Heart MrJones: and i tihnk i know more about art and shit like that then she does she is so main strem and she wont tihnk out of the lil box she has set her self in
I Heart MrJones: liek my sister is everything my mom wants she got together with the boy my mom picked for her she does eveything my mom tells her ot she dress how my mom likes
I Heart MrJones: and i dont wanna be bornig
I Heart MrJones: im myslef
I Heart MrJones: she tihnks i just try to be liek every one eles
Iheartzachycarl: but you dont
I Heart MrJones: but thats not me and youy know that
I Heart MrJones: im so different
Iheartzachycarl: you are different
I Heart MrJones: and she think i was all on a bunch of drugs
Iheartzachycarl: youre unique
I Heart MrJones: and i was not
I Heart MrJones: liek today she was like think about how much money you spent on percings i know you had ur vag done
I Heart MrJones: i waslike no!!!!!!!!!!
I Heart MrJones: she wa sliek whatever ur a freak and i know youy did
I Heart MrJones: and im liek no
I Heart MrJones: and then she goes and i know you did a bunch of drugs witth nikki
I Heart MrJones: it pisses me off
I Heart MrJones: cuz i try and tell her about my life but she wont listen she just asumes
Iheartzachycarl: she obviously doesnt trust you
Iheartzachycarl: you didnt ever get your vag done that i can recall
I Heart MrJones: i know but thats the thing she never gives me a chance
I Heart MrJones: its liek she knows nothign about my life
I Heart MrJones: but when i try and tell her she is liek i dont wanna here it
Iheartzachycarl: do you tlel her that?
Iheartzachycarl: i bet you do
I Heart MrJones: yeah but she is just liek stop tellign me im a bad mom
Iheartzachycarl: that fucking sucks
I Heart MrJones: but its liek the last to yeaars i have compeley lost her
I Heart MrJones: but i cant tell her cuz she wont let me talk
I Heart MrJones: i feel liek as i get older im just going to lose her
I Heart MrJones: i dont think she knows how much i look up to her
Iheartzachycarl: can you tell your dad? is there anyone in your family you can tell who can maybe get through to her?
I Heart MrJones: but when i tell her she thinks im being fake
I Heart MrJones: he just is liek a retard that cant think on his own
I Heart MrJones: and goes " i dont wanna hear about it"
I Heart MrJones: so i just act liek im pisssed at the world
Iheartzachycarl: and your brother does the same thing, right?
I Heart MrJones: when i try to explan myslef they just go....
I Heart MrJones: you killing ur mom
I Heart MrJones: but im not
I Heart MrJones: she is killing me with lack of trust and understanding
Iheartzachycarl: how are you kiling your mom?
Iheartzachycarl: that makes no sense
I Heart MrJones: no i nkow
I Heart MrJones: and today my dad said ... look at urslef ur discusting
I Heart MrJones: it hurts me they cant look past the hair and the clothing and see that im a good person
I Heart MrJones: arre u there?
Iheartzachycarl: youre not disgusting
Iheartzachycarl: your parents have major issues w/ themselves
I Heart MrJones: i nkow
I Heart MrJones: my dad just walked int he room and saw me crying and goes " theres smothign wrong with u ur instable
I Heart MrJones: but im not
Iheartzachycarl: youre pretty stable.. ive only seen you have one outburst in a long time
Iheartzachycarl: thats stable
Iheartzachycarl: everyone has bad days
I Heart MrJones: they out burst every day
I Heart MrJones: instead of thinkign maybe us putting her down every 35 secs makes her sad they go...
I Heart MrJones: there you are on line again doing freak things
I Heart MrJones: they think there normal
I Heart MrJones: but there not
I Heart MrJones: they full of rage
I Heart MrJones: and there pissed all the time
Iheartzachycarl: online is normal!
I Heart MrJones: she just makes shit up so she can avoid that fact that its her
Iheartzachycarl: exactly
Iheartzachycarl: somehow, you gotta be the bigger person and see past that
Iheartzachycarl: try to void it out
I Heart MrJones: i cant cuz she is my mom
I Heart MrJones: and in a year im not goign to need her for money or anything im goignt o need her ot be my friedn
I Heart MrJones: and she has never been my friend
I Heart MrJones: cuz she does not want to be
Iheartzachycarl: shes gonna lose you that way
I Heart MrJones: its liek you know so much mor e about me thna she does
I Heart MrJones: i dont think i know of any one eles that has to go thru this shit with there moma nd dad
Iheartzachycarl: i know people who have shitty relationships w/ their prarents
Iheartzachycarl: different problems
Iheartzachycarl: but yes, i probably know more than your mom does
I Heart MrJones: its sad
I Heart MrJones: its like she jsut wants ot think hella bad thign about me
I Heart MrJones: i tihnk its cuz she was never able to be hereslef
I Heart MrJones: she was always what everyone wanted
I Heart MrJones: and imo one of the few people she has been around alot that is able to
I Heart MrJones: i think about thinks way diffent from her maybe its my age
Iheartzachycarl: ohhhh
Iheartzachycarl: maybe shes jealous?
I Heart MrJones: yes
I Heart MrJones: i wopuld be if i was 47 and lived my hole life being what everyone wanted me to be
I Heart MrJones: and never steped out of the box iw as in
I Heart MrJones: and then had a kid who could give a shit what the world wanted from her and did what made her happy
I Heart MrJones: im happy
I Heart MrJones: and she does not see that
Iheartzachycarl: she isnt
Iheartzachycarl: and she wishes she was
I Heart MrJones: she thinks i do these things cuz im not
I Heart MrJones: and i tihnk she knowas its not easy beign urslef and im stong and i can
I Heart MrJones: alot of people arnt and cant..
this is never ending |
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| ok MY MOM aND DAD ARe CRAZY... zach read this |
[Oct. 4th, 2004|05:30 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  aggravated | ] |
oh man...
they are of there rockers...
just a few days and im 20!!!!!!!!!!!!
here is a list of things i want from you...
12 - 16 inch bog
a doggy
candy
meatwad tee shirt
money
new shears
hello kitty stuff
candy
pot
beer
and candy... thats it.. note if i dont get that bong lll cry..
hint ZACH there is a 60buck one on haight scott knows which ones if you ,scott, dan , lisa and dahara go in on it you can get it hahahaha...
k<3 |
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| wow |
[Oct. 1st, 2004|12:01 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
i just worked 11 hours.... shit ... now i got a pipe in my lap and i bong at my side ... and a test book atm ym other side thats right my test date is here oct 14th... so any way..... dude!!!!!!!!!!! oct 9th im going to be 20 party are u ready? |
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| so today... |
[Sep. 17th, 2004|11:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | worried | ] |
| [ | music |
| | bob marley | ] |
oh oh today was good
i cleaned out my closet
sold 140 bucks in cloths to my work
got 90 bucks in new cloths
got 28 in cash
got a bong for 10 bucks
got dinner for me and dick
and still had more money than i had in the start
so good
JP I LOVE YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!
thats all |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 14th, 2004|08:02 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  creative | ] |
theres nothing better than a empty house, and really loud bob marley... i love it... for once i think my life is not to shitty...
i went from hating my house to loving it i truly love every last person i live with like i love my brother or sister ...
fall out boy oct 12th whos in?
my b day oct 9th got any ideas?
all you niigas that said i turned pop on a frim flop... you were right
I GOT THE JOB AFTER ALL !! yes |
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| so |
[Sep. 14th, 2004|12:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
things are looking up , i got laid , but i did not get the job i wanted kinda sucks ...
everyone go to salinas on the 25 k thats all |
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| so... |
[Sep. 12th, 2004|01:55 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  geeky | ] |
last night i went to target with my mom ... got aqua teen season 2 and some coloring books ... so we are in target .. we walk around the coner and theres MIKE!!! holy shit ... we looked right at eachother and then tured are heads fast it mad me sad at 1st then after a while it kinda made me happy cuz i really should not give a shit and i dont or somthing... any way being in salinas is so overrated now i miss my ashley alot. i wanna ogto la with my mom this week end to see her , im broke but i still smoke like evey day thanks to all the nigs that smoke me out its rad...
agoodwarwon: amatuer strip night is when?
I Heart MrJones: maybe tonight
I Heart MrJones: if i can find my id...
P. S . SOME ONE SLEEP WITH ME... k thats all |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2004|08:15 pm] |
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2 of the 5 people i live with are tottaly uncomfy with them slef and feel the need to be fake to fit in , i used to be that way it makes me sick , fuck it i am sick , sick of being alone , sick of having nothing to do, sick of living in this shit hole ... i wish killing ur slef was not so fucking scary cuz i wanna |
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